Thursday, January 27, 2005

Mind blowing.

I just explained what oral sex was to my grandmother.

Grams: I was watchin' this progrum on younguns havin' sex. And they said that kids as young as 13 were havin' sex and that if they weren't havin' sex they was havin' oral sex. I don't even know that that is!
Stevi: Really?
Grams: Well, no, honey, I don't know about things like that. Do you know what it is?
Stevi: Yeah, Grandma. It's when you pleasure your partner with your mouth . . . instead of your . . . vagina.
Grams: Really? That's what that is? You'd put your mouth down there? My God, I can't even imagine doing that.

Previously, we had been talking about preserves.

Stevi: Grandma, I can't believe I just had a conversation about oral sex with you. Weren't we just talking about preserves? How did we go from preserves to oral sex?
Grams: Well, they're both sticky!

Grandma is so on top of her game.

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